Monday, February 26, 2007

Letters of Resignation Are So 1990

My friend, who I'll refer to as Whitney's Biggest Fan from here on in, just managed to top his previously untoppable dramatic encounters. In the world of ridiculous stories, he's like the rare Olympian who competes with himself alone to break the standing record--no other athlete stands a chance. So if anyone was going to top his antics, it would be have be my friend himself.

Whitney's biggest fan has been a very successful mortgage broker for the past couple of years. Throughout his short tenure at an unnamed big bank, he's been able to purchase two homes, a BMW and, I'm sure, a considerable amount of fabulous Whitney paraphernalia. However, his success came at the expense of his free time as he found himself working around the clock to keep up with growing client demands.

I hadn't heard from him for a little while and decided to give him a call to get his sought after impressions on Academy Award outfit selections--the boy doesn't miss a trick. Side note: I was once at a bachelorette party in Miami and we had him on speaker phone while we were drinking wine in front of the TV. Educational comments such as "That neckline is all wrong for her" and "What an improvement from last year's chinsy flop" and "Do you ladies see how she's coordinated that clutch so perfectly with those shoes? Simply stunning," brought our viewer experience to a whole new level.

Anyway, Whitney's Biggest Fan told me that he needed a break a couple weeks ago, so he decided to take his mom on a little trip to Vegas. One night they went to see Barry Manilow where my friend had a realization: he was tired of his job. So, he whipped out his blackberry and shot off a message to his boss, just like that--a resignation. Read 'Em and Weep, pal.

Who quits their job from a Barry Manilow show via handheld device? Apparently, the same person who wins dramatic chat room fights with other Whitney fans who don't have their facts straight in website posts, who insists on straightening my hair for me before a big night out, who came up with the idea of an underground office publication with a column devoted to the accounting assistant's most fashionable outfit of the week (he loved her style) and who taught himself HTML in record time so that he could update a former company's website himself rather than rely on a webmaster whose color scheming "didn't work for him."

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Love it, it sounds so familiar???