Friday, August 7, 2009

A New York Minute

The following comments probably add up to about 1 minute in terms of how long it took for them to be uttered. However, my memory of these comments shall likely last at least as long as it took me to eat a real bagel with cream cheese accompanied by a spectacular cup of Dunkin' Donuts coffee. It's always good to go home...

While staying with Missy in the West Village
Me: was your date with boy X?
Missy: Oh him? He certainly wasn't worth the walk I endured to the heels.

While out with Eric one night
Random boy in a bar: Do you like me?
Me: Huh?
Random boy in a bar: Would you like me more if I told you I was 44th in line for the British throne? Cause I am.

While staying over at Justyn and Kyle's in Queens
Kyle: OK, Lauren. So, you can sleep in that room. Justyn and I will just be down the hall.
Me: OK, thanks. I always love staying here with you guys.
Kyle: Now...if you need anything tonight, just blow this whistle [lifts a whistle out of a bowl on the counter] and Justyn will come check in on you.
Justyn: WTF are you talking about? Where did you get that, Kyle?

After a long day spent snacking our way around Brooklyn (see above pic), walking over the Williamsberg Bridge and checking out the new High Line in the West Village
Rob: Idea--we make a mockumentary about how Michelle and I are both graphic artists who have had a life-long battle over developing the top-selling font on
Me: Oh! I could interview each of you about your style technique, naming strategies and artistic vision...kind of like in Best in Show when the characters are interviewed about their dogs.
Rob: Yeah, and in the end, can Michelle die and I get the last laugh when her tombstone is written in one of my fonts?
Me: Done

Another occurence while out with Eric
Random guy in a gay piano bar [pointing to Eric]: No
Eric: Why did you just say no when you were looking at me?
Random guy: Cause my friend and I are talking about who in this bar has nice feet. And you don't.
Eric: Oh, that's funny. Cause I was just talking to my friend about who in here has a nice face. And you don't.

Oh...summer in the city....


Unknown said...

It was a bell, not a whistle. ;) But a rape whistle for future guests isn't such a bad idea.

LJP said...

I was thinking you were concerned that I might need a glass of water or perhaps an iPhone charger. Damn, who knew that charming little Astoria is like livin' in East Balt'mo!

Lori said...

I went to college with a girl who claimed to be 32nd in line for the throne. One late night in studio we were mocking her and another fellow student uttered, "I was just down there; there's no line." (the loo is downstairs from studio)